The blindfold is a captor's first tool to keep their victim from finding their way, both physically and metaphorically. Removing them is not easy. We must reorient ourselves, face our fears, confront our past, and learn to live with the truth. But removing them is worth it, because it is the first step to freedom, healing, and growth. I've been thinking about the metaphorical blindfolds I wear, particularly the ones I’ve been working on removing.
The blindfold of self-sacrifice. I often put others’ needs before mine, even when I desperately need to care for myself. This leads to feeling burned out, and worse, when I’m not taking care of myself, I cannot be the best version of myself for others.
The blindfold of self-judgment. I have a hard time being compassionate to myself. I worry that if I’m kind to myself, I’m being selfish. This leads me to judge my thoughts and feelings instead of being compassionate toward them. And because I’m programmed to be harsh with myself, I end up unintentionally being harsh with others, too.
The blindfold of self-worth. I get caught thinking my worth is based on my productivity, possessions, or appearance. This leads to an unfulfilling, never-ending quest.
Among many other blindfolds, these keep me from finding my way. The only way to remove them is to become aware of them. Then, to challenge them. My goals are to:
Acknowledge my needs. Ask what I need at the moment to feel healthy and fulfilled. Begin to see self-care as necessary instead of selfish, and make a plan to take better care of myself physically, socially, spiritually, and emotionally.
Be kinder to myself. Begin to see self-compassion as essential, not selfish. (I’m going to re-read “Self-Compassion” by Kristen Neff).
Define my worth based on the fact that I exist as a unique and valuable human being and not based on what I accomplish or what I have. (I'm going to re-read “Daring Greatly” by Brené Brown).
Removing these blindfolds won't be easy, but it will help me find my way-- to greater fulfillment, growth, and joy.
